Sparkle Pony Made of Sparkles

Uh oh….these zombies want eyes too? That’s an unreasonable demand. Everyone knows that.

Gunky suddenly has an idea–maybe he and the ladies can hole up at the spa instead? There are hot tubs, mud baths, and lots of lotions and oils to make his abs look shiny and stuff. It’s win-win for everyone, really.

Your abs actually aren’t all that glistening anymore, after running from dead people who want to feast upon your brain and rolling on the grass while being possessed by cow plant figurines and being shoved down hills and all. This makes you feel somewhat anxious. Just a bit. Not like you’re about to totally freak out or anything.

Oh man oh man you can’t die like this, all sandy and still a bit itchy and with a couple of rashes in unfortunate places and what if some chick comes upon your dead body and your abs are not shining like the sun?!

If you must die, you are going to die gorgeous.

Figured out what Victoria is yet?

“So, Goopy, what’s your big plan now? Sing the Soviet national anthem at them, see if that blows their heads off?”

Iliana will be the first thrown to the zombies when you are king.

woot Gunky!

“No, Iliana, that is actually not my plan. Feel free to try it yourself, though. Maybe that way they’ll eat you first.”

Victoria, standing behind Iliana, smirks and snickers. You like that girl.

“I’m going to the spa. I guess you can come with me if you want to live or whatever.”

On the way look for gardens with garlic or wolfsbane or whatever it is that keeps zombies away. Maybe some of that groovy flamefruit?

Maybe you should check in with the book, see if it has any more helpful information to offer. Well, okay, maybe it wasn’t exactly all that helpful, but still.

You pull it out of your MIP. The purple glittering energy licks at your hand. You’re not scared it’s going to eat you or violate your mind or make you try to kill yourself. Not at all.

Your hands only shake a little bit as you flip to the second page.

“Hey, Veronica, what does this say?”

“I thought you learned how to read Ancient Simmerian a few minutes ago?”

The heat of shame rises to your face and you feel your cheeks going red. She winks and looks over your shoulder.

“Hmm. It says ‘The fruit of the flame purifies and cleanses. But will it kill? Only the gnome knows.’ Weird.”

“Well, I guess if we see any flaming fruits we’ll pick them up, just in case. Let’s go!”

You jog along towards the spa, keeping an eye out for any flaming fruits. Flaming fruits. Zombies probably wouldn’t like fire. Or fruit. They’re meat eaters, really. Hmm. So is the idea that they’re like oh noez fruit and try to run away but then the fruit is all FLAME and kills them with fire?

Only the gnome knows.

Veronica speaks up from behind you.

“Hey, I think the Wainwrights have a flame fruit plant. We could swing by there.”

“You know where they live?”

“Yeah, been to a couple of parties there.”

“All right, lead the way.”

woopwoop

Now you’re running behind Veronica. And next to Iliana.

“Why on earth did I hire you, Goopy?”

“Because I’m hot and you wanted my body.”

“Fair enough.”

You knew that’s why she was being so moody! Yes! Score! Girlfriend #6, woop woop! And then you can break up with her when Veronica ages up. Life is good. Except for the being chased by zombies thing.

You’re trying to figure out how to seal the deal with Iliana when Veronica says “We’re here.”

No one is home. The front windows are broken and the furniture is thrown around and there’s blood all over the walls. The zombies have been here and eaten the Wainwrights and left.

You saunter into the garden.

Fruit of FLAME!!!!

The plant glows. But not with a weird green or scary purple. It’s a gentle orange glow.

It buzzes as you harvest it. Zzzzzzzzzz.

You place it carefully in your MIP and stand up, feeling the fruit’s warm glow in your pants. On to the spa!

spa omg

Ah, the spa. The lotions in the window call out to you. “Gunky, come open us. Gunky, come use us. Gunky, come rub us all over your chest.”

Your abs are going to glisten so hard. You’re going to sparkle like a sparkle pony made of sparkles. You’re going to blind the zombies with your shine as you lob fruits of fire at them.

Perhaps you run into that cute waitress you saw at the diner yesterday when you were grabbing a bite before the party, a man like you surely needs at least three non-zombie damsels in distress to protect. Who can resist pink skull pants combined with socks-and-sandals?

RUBY!!!

The door slides open. Someone’s here! And she’s a girl and she’s not green and she is very much alive!

And she looks familiar.

OMG! She’s that waitress from yesterday! She slipped you her number and everything and she was really cute and what in the world is she wearing now?

“Ruby?”

Isn't she cute?!

“Oh hi, Gunky! I think the gnome wants you.”

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15 Responses to Sparkle Pony Made of Sparkles

  1. DB loves her Mac says:

    The gnome. Is that what they call the vertically challenged masseur dude with the unfortunate nose? It’s so not cool for a dude to go to a dude for a massage, but if Ruby says… you go inside and flop up on the massage table.

    Like

  2. mountainshade1 says:

    LOL – “If you must die, you are going to die gorgeous.”

    Yay, I had Gunky with my morning coffee, a great start to the day. Alright, here is my input:

    Ruby’s voice is like balm to your ragged mind and you simply need to keep talking to her. Just seeing her has given you a warm buzzing feeling in the nether regions, though that could also be caused by the flame fruits. A man must not deny his instincts, the gnome can wait.

    Like

    • DB loves her Mac says:

      I bet the zombies wish they could say they’d had Gunky with their morning coffee! 😉

      Like

      • mountainshade1 says:

        Hahaha! I never thought of it that way.

        The zombies can have his brain and eyes, I’ll be happy as long as I can get those glistening abs. 😀

        Like

  3. esmeiolanthe says:

    Where can you get a helmet like that? It would totally go with the pink skull pants of love. And maybe it’s even lined with tinfoil — you know, to stop the book taking over your brain and stuff.

    Like

  4. raquelaroden says:

    Ruby tries to ban Iliana and Veronica from the spa for some trumped-up reason, and Gunky is tempted to let her because she’s treating him like he’s royalty or something–like a pliable little love-slave just waiting for orders.

    Like

  5. Rad says:

    The gnome is fed up. He wants some new clothes. If you get them for him he’ll consider talking to you some more.

    Like

  6. Sara2573 says:

    Hey guyz look im back!!! With the sims 3 and internet …bonus!!! Awesome story Misty! Love it and the comments idea was amazing.

    “Follow me” says Ruby. You follow her behind the spa where theres a gnome. Ruby says something in… well some language you dont know. Then the gnome speaks “Hello Goopy I heard you need help” You look at Ruby questionly. “Follow me Gunky.” You follow her somewhere youve never been. She holds hands with you “The gnome is magic he talks if you promise him something in return and… Gunky I really like you.” She gives you a kiss… on the lips. Girlfriend #6!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Like

  7. medleymisty says:

    🙂

    I do believe I will be feeling Gunky tonight and will work on the next update. Hopefully I’ll get it done, since tomorrow night I have to go to my sister-in-law’s orchestra concert.

    Took a quick glance at the comments. Oh, this is going to be fun. 😉

    Like

  8. tipix7 says:

    Ruby looks ready for the zombie-apocalypse with that helmet, maybe she has some nifty outfits for the other two as well? Having an army of potential girlfriends could be useful. Not that you’d need such things of course, you cut a much finer figure as leader without helmet-hair.

    Like

  9. The “gnome” can wait, but first things first. You finger-gun your way past Ruby, grinning the sexiest “I ain’t-scare-of-no-zombies” grin, and open one of the lotion bottles to regain your shiny sparkly man-abs.

    Because, you know, one look at the full pink skulls of manliness with sparkly man-abs ensemble and Ruby will be at your mercy. Even if you weren’t the only non-zombified guy left in town.

    Like

  10. moondaisy101 says:

    OMG! This is so much fun!
    ***

    “Gnome?” For three long seconds your mouth hangs open. Then you close it quickly before a fly flies in: who knows where it has been in this blood-painted town where non-zombies are now struggling with issues like bladder control?
    “Is that Gnome who ain’t listening?” you ask and then you start thinking – which is difficult without a braincap like Ruby is wearing.
    Why would you make time for him? You had to talk to a cow because of his earlier lack of interest and that life-enhancing experience nearly made you, the very manly hero of this story, wish for retention nappies. Time is precious and so are your abs (even if you don’t have the money to indulge them and you doubt Iliana will).
    And how does Ruby know the lazy bum anyway? Does she give her telephone number to everyone?

    Like

  11. Abby says:

    You, Iliana, and Veronica try to run away, but you see that you’ve been cornered by a gnome army! There’s nothing left to do but to walk inside.

    Like

  12. HAB says:

    alright:
    find out that girlfriend #2’s kid is also a zombie, and OOH OOH! Make the kid after his brains too! 😀

    I love this story 🙂

    Like

  13. medleymisty says:

    All right. I’ve copied and pasted all the comments into a draft, and by tomorrow night there will be a Gunky update.

    But right now I’m setting up another blog for a Who’s Your Daddy challenge, lol. But I swear on Seth that there will be a Gunky update by the time I go to bed tomorrow.

    Like

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